what you see is NOT what you get
what you get is a perspective of what you see
what you do not get is what you see right
what is left you get but you can’t see
what you do not get is what you see not wrong
waht is right you see but you can’t get
~Meno~ says:
so wht is life 2 u now?
>>Socrates says:
i think is very much in transit now, i think i am all over the place, very bad, rotten, crap
~Meno~ says:
i might not have so much 2 share like u…
~Meno~ says:
but i’ll listen 2 u…
>>Socrates says:
Thanks, is nice to have someone as listener, like echo, feel that you are really talking by reflecting your own voice, and the listener can do a lot of thing to make you feel good, even more than good sometimes, you can fell in love
~Meno~ says:
oooo….ya…true….
~Meno~ says:
so u spend most of all free time posting all ur words onto ur blog?
>>Socrates says:
well, i used to not able to do that, i have been trying hard to learn to write, but lately i had great breakthrough, just out of suddenly i wrote and i am writing, and i never stopped, i am writing, and i am not stopping
~Meno~ says:
so is tht a way 4 u 2 release ur tension, unsatisfaction ….?
>>Socrates says:
no, never about that, is a way i question the existence of life
>>Socrates says:
i am a philosopher you see, born with this premature sickness of my neurons keep firing for existence questions without my conscious awareness, it like auto pilot you know, runs by itself, i feel the pain if i don’t manage it well
~Meno~ says:
actually y do u question bout ur existence? do u feel that u dunno what u r living 4?
>>Socrates says:
well, you are right on the point, i really don’t know what i am living for, why do i wanna to know, well, is a calling i believe, or maybe i am just too stupid, too dumb to know what is going on so i need to figure it out
~Meno~ says:
erm…thn u gotta make ur way out…
~Meno~ says:
urself is the only solution to all sorts of prob
>>Socrates says:
my way out? Perhaps is fate, philosophy is fate, fate is the way out perhaps, fate has no destiny
~Meno~ says:
fate is in ur hand my fren…
>>Socrates says:
mm, you suddenly sound like god, i don’t know, coz i don’t know god, i have no god in me, i have no faith you know, coz faith is me all along, faith is fate to me
~Meno~ says:
its not anythg bout god…i thk tht’s so true…we make things happen n not juz sitting thr waiting destiny 2 guide us. isnt tht true 2 u?
>>Socrates says:
is true, yes, don’t wait, just write, read, tell, show, attract, acquire, manage, troubleshoot, distress, release, let go, sit, do nothing, wait for destiny
~Meno~ says:
…alright….
~Meno~ says:
was juz trying 2 pull u out frm the darkness….but i thk i can’t help much..
~Meno~ says:
sometimes things r not tht bad as we thk…
>>Socrates says:
you are right, is not about bad, is just being dark, is cold there, is nice, not hot, cozy, you can see the light from inside while not being blind by brightness
~Meno~ says:
well…if u’r comfortable with the way u r than it’s not a problem…juz live ur life the way u wan…
>>Socrates says:
i don’t know how to life actually, i just don’t know what is right or wrong, i don’t know what is absolute, not sure i know certainty either, i am just being perceptive, not good nor bad, not right nor wrong, try to live without being judgmental, try to live a postmodern life, in a poetic way, coz passion to be is everything, is the soul food, it feeds my existence
~Meno~ says:
great…at least u found ur passion…
so tht’s the only thing tht motivates u @ the moment now?
>>Socrates says:
is a lost and found thing, but is the direction forward, for now, ya, without it, i wouldn’t be able to write, you see, and won’t be reading all the craps
~Meno~ says:
do u hv close frens that u trust?
>>Socrates says:
i have, i think i have, i am not so sure, i don’t know really
~Meno~ says:
good if u have….but y not sure…
>>Socrates says:
because i am not sure of things you know, everything is so surreal and abstract to me, like painting, images
~Meno~ says:
thn u must b very empty …
~Meno~ says:
have u ever feel whole??
>>Socrates says:
i did, but then when i did, i feel nothing
~Meno~ says:
huh….like how….
~Meno~ says:
u mean it didnt last?
>>Socrates says:
nothing last
>>Socrates says:
otherwise time will be irrelevant and space collapsed
~Meno~ says:
ha…ya…thts true….but at least it last 4 sumtime
>>Socrates says:
it decays, have you ever see things got decayed? it turns ugly, smelly, old, dry, turn to ashes and eventually vanished
~Meno~ says:
but not all not evrythg
~Meno~ says:
sumthg is to eteRnity….
~Meno~ says:
juz tht u hvnt found it
>>Socrates says:
you are right, i haven’t find any thing that eternal yet, absolute in shape, perfect in nature, complete as a whole coz i am not, perfect, i am imperfect, complex, messy, dark, yes darkness is eternal to me, darkness is the nature, perfection, completion, whole, everything and anything
~Meno~ says:
no one is perfect… u gotta find sm1 who sees u as perfect…
~Meno~ says:
n u c her as perfect too…
>>Socrates says:
har, just like my line in ‘the one i am so sick of loving’….’your incompletion completes me’
~Meno~ says:
ya….
~Meno~ says:
thn…
~Meno~ says:
juz as u say…life is a package of good n bad…
~Meno~ says:
if u choose 2 accept the bad.. afterall everythg may not seem so dark.
>>Socrates says:
is so true…..what i wrote, things are just not eternal, what i wrote were the past
~Meno~ says:
look forward thn… ur completion to life is right ahead mayb….who nws….
>>Socrates says:
ahead for sure, completion is about incompletion, and future is incomplete, is true, thus what ahead of thus is incomplete, including life, hope you get what i mean…..
~Meno~ says:
………….ok bye
>>Socrates says:
bye
Sometimes you are tired of being too loud for critics, you feel noisy, you feel dizzy, you feel tired, you feel the fatigue, you feel the chill of the burning passion, you feel weak, you long for peace and nostalgia, you want to go home.
But nostalgic life at home which suppose to promote peace, is very decisive in nature because peace is promoted by suppressing free will and existence, nobody wants to talk about it and people just abuse it, manipulate it, prevent it, all to protect their selfish pathetic interests and consciousness that doesn’t exist.
In nostalgic life people dont’ share, they don’t talk about it, they are not conscious enough to talk about it, but they fake it, they fake collaboration, fake team work, fake sharing, they fake harmony, they fake knowledge, they fake it so well and it becomes the truth of living, truth of survival, the mainstream culture, it becomes so real till the deception is not easy to fake, they even try to fake consciousness, because they are too afraid of being real, they are not capable of being real, they just dare not because it is not their status quo, they are too selfish to change, too self-centered to innovate, and they fake all that, and make lives so invisible and complex to live with.
Living a ciritical life is not about living a perfect life, is not even about being imperfect, nothing good about it, in fact it is badly damaged, very stressful, full of suprises, never lack of variety and diversity, sometimes just too much to handle, you simply just exist for nothing.
You can vanish yourself in the crowded sea of people, feel extremely lonely in a buzy environment, helpless without hope, and the wave of disappointment & distress can hit you again and again without fail.
But the phenomena is a rational process, is about being pragmatic, is about how good you are in being who you are and what you are, the brutal fact of survival for total honesty of critical production, growth, creativity and existence.
In a critical life, you move fast, you think fast, you change fast, you feel excited about being fast, so fast that you don’t feel anything anymore, you feel nothing.
You deal with existence, question existence, destroy existence. You feel that you exist, you provoke your existence, your point of view, people listen, they appreciate your provocations, or they ignore and walk away.
Things never stopped. You’ll always be able to stand tall with your existence, even short of audiences and listeners, it may even be a lie, an illussion, subjective nothingness, but no one’s going to care about, no one is going to attack you and stalk away your intellectual right.
Your comfort zone is always being challenged, you always move on with your life, stability means keep being unstable. Passion is the key reason why you continue to suffer and struggle for existence that doen’t exist in forms, often chaotic, feeling being blindfolded in darkness from the city limelight, feeling empty, feeling nothing.
The mind is real, the world is not, it is an option, not a choice.
You want a peaceful life, but it isn’t one that exists, you constantly having warfare with your mind, what don’t and what do, it squeezes you to insignfinance nothingness, you don’t exist, only the world does.
But then you have the options, you can either live aloud in a critical life or you can choose to be silent in a nostalgic life. If peace of mind is the choice in life, the formal obtain it by challenging the status quo, discontinue to continue, develop by destroying or destroy to develop, pleasure is pain, is about the future that doesnt’ yet exist, the latter achieves peace by suppressing voices, pushing it far behind beneath, hear the silence, hear nothing, see the fact, nothing beyond the fact, you see the darkness, you see nothing and you dont’ exist.
I am a complex person with a simple mind. I make simple things complex and complex things simplified, just to figure out my existence, which is either simple, complex or nothing. Is like a cup of tea either is about the cup or the tea, which come first? you see, i am full of nothing.
I can be poetic and prolific with simple complexity. I see a clear sky with nothing, i hear the wind blow from nowhere, i feel the chill from the fire that is burning inside me.
I have terrible memory leakage, often forgetful, most of the time in dream like state of mind when i am awake. I remember nothing most of the time, which is the only thing i remember.
My 5 senses are mulfunctioned, i am not a sensitive person, don’t think i able to sense, i don’t have the 6th sense either, i don’t have common sense, because i am not a common person, the world lost me most of the time. Therefore i own none of the six senses except the 7th one, nonsense.
I like subjective rhetoric, i read monologues, love cinematography, indulge into art direction, i like nothing.
my heart sings delightfully to hope for what i have not sung,
as night sips the soup of the day,
i cheerfully waited the dawn to sweep the tears of the day
i visualize your vivid smile,
taste of your lips,
speaking to my ear with the smell of your perfume,
You make my day through & i wish you a great afternoon ahead
1. Life is indeed a drama, so let’s act on it. You always get want you do not want, so instead of letting your emotion hijacks your mood, you dramatize the affect by not intepreting the meanings but transcending it. The only setback is now you can’t think to live but live to think.
2. Your action is always as a result of reaction of ‘others’. So react, before you act. Actually this is a bit the same like the point No 1 of living a drama-tic life. So let’s make it only 1 point then, and that is point No 3 = No 1 + No 2.
happiness ended and sadness begins
you wish its never happened, but it did without a beginning
things went wrong when decision to react to a situation split
so you call this a logic or a fate?
is logic because i didn’t manage the turning point well,
too occupied with the big picture but neglect the sensitivity,
is a fate bc i failed to manage the logic of the turning point
at the right time it supposes to be,
yes, timing, is always a fate in it, the turning point or the drama, is another
so how can one manage timing and drama effectively? the answer is fate..
to see the good side of one’s character is to appreciate the bad side of it,
the sums of parts is greater than the whole,
while the whole can’t be broken down into parts for analysis,
the parts exist while the whole not,
but the whole defines what the parts about.
life is a package, good and bad comes with it.
